From the Vault: Parrrr-tay!!

One of my very first blog entries from Jan. 18, 2005, and what is a more relevant way to celebrate your first post on your new site dedicated solely to humor. I find this piece to be especially relevant this time of year, seeing as how party season is in full swing. Enjoy!

I always laugh when I attend festivities, no matter what the type, age of the attendees or location. Why do parties give me the giggle fits? Have you ever actually looked at a party’s cast of characters?

Well, next time you attend a shindig, keep your eye out for some of the party regulars.

1. The early dancer: The first person to hit the dance floor. Alcohol sometimes, but does not always, contribute to his/her funk. I find the early dancer tends to be a woman. Usually the first to go home with a member of the opposite sex.

2. The Lonely Dancer: This fun, but odd, fellow is usually found slow dancing solo. Very amusing to watch as he/she holds themselves and sway about. Even funnier when dancing in front of a mirror, more or less making out with his/her own reflection.

3. The Mullet Brigade: I have never been to a party where I didn’t count at least one person sporting a mullet. They’re more common here in the Midwest, but I’ve found them in the Deep South, on the East Coast, even in London. They not only party in the back, as they bring alcohol-induced hilarity and know how to get down on the dance floor.

4. Boogie Grannie/Grampa: The adorable senior citizen who shakes a tail feather to music ranging from oldies to hard core rap. My personal favorite!

5. Hootchie Mama: Always a female. She usually arrives with a boy, but whether or not she leaves with the same one…only time will tell. She’s almost always dragging at least two other royal subjects (the smart one and the chubby one–really only chubby in comparison to her Royal Hootchieness). They skank about the party doing what they can to make sure all eyes are on them.

I guarantee that the next time you’re at a party you’ll be scoping out your favorite cast members! I always do!